General Convention Day 2...

General Convention Day 2…

Day 2 at General Convention was full and exciting.  Lots of alumni, Bishops and friends came by the SSW booth.  Everyone has been willing to share their thoughts and ideas about leadership in the Church.  In my opinion, this is a sign of how invested my brothers and sisters in Christ are in the process of growing and nourishing the Episcopal Church.

I have tried to post on facebook and twitter important resolutions that have been discussed and past through both the House of Deputies and House of Bishops.  Yesterday afternoon both Houses welcomed the Bishop Elects of 8 Dioceses.  There was excitement in the air in both Houses.  I was grateful to witness these important moments.

I suspect Day 3 will be filled with more excitement.  I hope we continue to have lots of activity at the SSW booth.  Of course I always love talking about my amazing seminary!!! 

Stay tuned!  Blessings as the ride continues… 

Mary Balfour

General Convention Day 1...

General Convention Day 1…

Today I arrive in Indianapolis for the 77^th General Convention of the Episcopal Church.   There is excitement in the air!!!  I love the energy and I guess I am becoming a Church nerd.  It is exciting to hear everyone discuss the resolutions and committee meetings as well as worshipping together everyday. 

I spent a lot of time today at the Seminary of the Southwest booth.  We had many visitors including alumni, Bishops, and new friends.  It is really thrilling watching all of these people come together to serve the Episcopal Church.  I feel honored to be a part of it.

Tomorrow I hope to experience some committee meetings, participate in the morning Eucharist, meet new people in the Exhibition Hall, and share lots of news with all of you at home. 

Stay tuned!  Blessings as the ride continues… 

Mary Balfour

General Convention...

General Convention…

I am thrilled to be a part of the Southwest Six as we journey to Indianapolis to participate in the 77^th General Convention of the Episcopal Church.  On Thursday of this week I will travel to Indianapolis to meet the other seminarians from the Seminary of the Southwest.  We will have the opportunity to meet Episcopalians from all over the country, sit in on committee meetings, hopefully chat with a bishop or two, and recruit lots of visitors to the SSW booth!

I really feel honored to have the opportunity to represent my seminary and to be a part of General Convention.  So many of the decisions that are made at General Convention shape who we are as Episcopalians.  Although we are a diverse community with a variety of opinions, the one thing that remains a strong between us is a love for God and ALL of His people.

I will be tweeting, blogging, and facebooking throughout my time in Indianapolis.  So whatever your favorite mode of social media is, please follow along!  I would also appreciate your prayers for the Southwest Six, the faculty and staff from SSW that are attending, and all of the delegates and clergy that will be present.  May we all carry each other in love throughout our time together in Indianapolis.

Before I head up north, I will be spending twenty-four hours at my favorite place, Monteagle!  My family has celebrated the 4^th of July on the Holy Mountain for generations.  It is an occasion that I have rarely missed through out my lifetime.  I am thankful that my family can be in fellowship together celebrating the birth of our country.

Expect lots of posts over the next week!  Blessings as the ride continues… 

Mary Balfour

Clinical Pastoral Education...

Clinical Pastoral Education…

I haven’t had the courage to write about Clinical Pastoral Education (CPE) yet, because to be completely honest it has been a daily struggle for me and I don’t think I am very good at it.  CPE is basically being a chaplain at a hospital for one summer during your seminary experience.  In my case, I am working for a VA hospital in Murfreesboro, Tennessee, where my parents live.  From my understanding, the purpose of CPE is to discover issues within yourself and how to handle them in addition to working on your listening skills, becoming comfortable in a hospital, and experiencing death.

The VA hospital in Murfreesboro has many psychiatric patients in addition to a community living center, an acute care unit and a rehabilitation unit.  I want to share with you that I feel honored to spend my days with men and women who have given their time to serve our country.  With that being said, it is also extremely difficult to realize that I can’t “fix” their situations.  I am hoping that just walking in the room, listening and being present helps in some way.

In the past two days, I have had the pleasure of meeting two men that are full of joy, life and an amazing love of our God.  One was a Baptist minister for over 50 years.  Some of you will find this hard to believe, but he spent over an hour telling me his life story - I didn’t say one word!  The Holy Spirit was in the room as we talked, and I walked away feeling more than touched, almost changed.  I got so much out of my time with this incredible man.  He touched my heart.

Today, I spent time with a 91-year-old man who is at the end of his life.  He knows that he is dying and even though there is some emotion associated with the end of his life, he is not afraid and is confident he will be in heaven with his wife and Jesus.  I am more than confident that heaven is exactly where he is going.  This man has raised 9 children and 3 grandchildren and is content with his life.  Content, there is that word again. 

The last two days have been good days.  Honestly, most days are not as good.  There is grief, anger, loneliness, pain and many days, death.  I often don’t know what to say or how to comfort a patient or family.  All I know to do is pray.  So that is what I do.  Sometimes I am really afraid that someone is going to pass out, be in pain or even die in my presence.  This is flat out scary to me.  Someone I love very much reminded me the other day that being with someone as they die is one of the most intimate experiences they have ever experienced.  I need to find that courage to be intimate, not afraid, not anxious, and just present.  I am working on it.

I ask for prayers for the men and women at the VA, prayers for my classmates who are also experiencing CPE, my friends from other seminaries who are participating in CPE, and for me, that God will give me strength.  Thank you as always for your love and devotion.  

Blessings as the ride continues…  Mary Balfour

Porch Girls...

Porch Girls...

For over 25 years my mother and some of her closest friends have been gathering the second weekend in June at our family’s summer cottage in Monteagle, Tennessee.  This group of women call themselves the porch girls and for three days every year, they laugh, they play, but most importantly they support each other through the good times and the difficult times. 

I often ask my Mom if I might make a guest appearance and visit.  I just want to be a part of it all.  There is nothing better than sitting on the porch, eating wonderful food, and enjoying the company of these women.  I had the opportunity to be with the Porch Girls this weekend, and oh it was good for the soul.  Not only do they care deeply for my mother, and each other, but they care for me as well.  They listened so intently as I told them of my experiences at Seminary, CPE this summer, and life in general.  One of the ladies, who I know without a shadow of a doubt prays faithfully for all aspects of my life, told me this morning that she sees a sense of contentment in me.  Contentment, wow, what a powerful word.  I think she is right, I am content.  Content with the direction God is leading my life, content with the fact that I am seminarian, content that I have been blessed with wonderful friendships and family, and finally content with the truth that God is forming me into a priest.

I love the fact that my mother has these women, sisters, and friends in her life.  What a blessing and instrument of love that these women are to each other.  Everything is sacred and safe between them.  There is no judgment, there is no fear, there is just love.  So, to the porch girls, thank you for loving me, my family, and most importantly my AMAZING mother.  Thank you for being a part of this journey and your never ceasing prayers.  May we all find the kind of friendship that you all have given to each other and just be content in that bond that binds us all together.

Blessings as the ride continues…

Mary Balfour

Sweet Bessie and Jeff...

Sweet Bessie and Jeff...

I was feeling a little bit low today after a long day at CPE and a difficult conversation tonight.  I walked in to the living room tonight quite frankly sad.  My Mom immediately said to me, I have something I want you to listen too.  A few days before, Mom had printed out all of my blog posts from the entire semester and mailed them to our lovely friends Bessie and Jeff.  Bessie and Jeff are a couple from Selma, Alabama that we got to know when Daddy was the rector of St. Paul’s, Selma.  They are a kind, caring, and loving couple and they have always been interested in me and especially supportive of my calling to the priesthood.  Bessie left a message on the answering machine telling me how proud she was of me, that she was going to take my advice about some of the prayer suggestions that I made, and that Jeff had read the posts several times and loved them.  In her message, she said how much she loved me and that she would continue to pray for me.  After I listened to the message I started to cry. 

Sometimes, we try to change ourselves to be what we think others want us to be, to please people, and to be something that we just plain are not.  Bessie and Jeff don’t want me to change, they love me for exactly for who I am, the person that God created, and loves unconditionally.  I am so appreciative of Bessie and Jeff for many reasons, but most of all for loving me as a child of God.  It is people like Bessie and Jeff that help us look for the light and remember that we have to find God in the situation, we have to give grace to others, and we can only be the person we are created to be.  Thank you sweet Bessie and Jeff, you are shining examples of disciples of Christ.  I will forever hold you close to my heart.

More on my Clinical Pastoral Education experience soon.  Today is about celebrating the people I love dearly, which includes all of you who are reading this.  Thank you for continuing to support and love me.  I am truly blessed.

Blessings as the ride continues…

Mary Balfour

I noticed you today, Lord. Thank you.

I noticed you today, Lord.  Thank you.

“I noticed you today, Lord.  Thank you.”  These are the words of the Rt. Rev. Duncan Gray, Bishop of the Diocese of Mississippi in his “Reflections from the Road” piece in the May edition of The Mississippi Episcopalian.  I was struck by Bishop Gray’s words, “I noticed you today.”  In my own life, there have been many days when I didn’t even notice God.  Isn’t that sad, there are whole days when I don’t even notice God.  That seems impossible when I look around and marvel in the beauty that surrounds me.  The lush richness of the Tennessee mountains, the pure joy of watching Owen’s excitement to go on a walk, watching my friend Mary Catherine commit herself to God and the Church as a deacon.

As I am settling into life in Tennessee for the summer, I am paying close attention to God and trying to at least notice Him everyday.  I am thankful to be home with my parents and one of my brothers.  It is nice just to be with them.  I am looking forward to serving as chaplain at the VA Hospital here in Murfreesboro this summer.  I am also looking forward to many weekend trips to the Holy Mountain, hopefully a trip or two to Birmingham and of course General Convention in Indianapolis.

The major goal I have for the summer, outside of learning all that I can during CPE, is to establish a spiritual discipline.  In the spiritual formation class that I took last fall, we discussed many different types of practices.  This summer, my goal is to find the right fit for me and to put that practice into place.  Spiritual disciplines can help us release anxiety and stress, focus on specific prayer request for others, and ourselves, and simply rest with God.  I believe that this is essential for me to be able to help others, but most importantly enrich my relationship with God.

The first year of seminary is behind me, the challenge of CPE and the rest of my seminary days are before me.  Thank you all for continuing to support my calling to the priesthood.  With God’s help, I can actually see this dream becoming reality.  Thanks be to God that I notice Him today.

Blessings as the ride continues…

Mary Balfour