The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it....

The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it……

It is Christmas Day and I am sitting at my parent’s house with my Grandmother, my Aunt Sally, my Uncle Donald, my brother Thomas and my parents. Of course Lucille (Thomas’ dog) and Owen are with us too. I am certainly missing my brother Knox’s presence.

Brunch is in the oven and we have just returned from the Christmas Day service at St. Paul’s Episcopal Church. Daddy officiated and I preached. I also got to stand at the altar during Eucharist and learn from one of the best. It was a glorious Christmas present! One of my gifts to Daddy was to preach my sermon without him reading it. As you know, Daddy reads everything I write. I really wanted him to just enjoy the sermon. I think he did and so did the rest of my family. So, I thought you all might enjoy reading it as well.

My heart is full and I am so thankful for the amazing Christmas present that God gave us, His son Jesus. Happy Birthday Jesus and Merry Christmas to you all!

Christmas Day Sermon
December 25, 2011
John 1:1-14
Preached at St. Paul’s Episcopal Church
Murfreesboro, TN

I will never forget the moment, I was in deep pain and felt I couldn’t go on. It was a few days before I was to meet with the Commission on Ministry and I was petrified! How could I possibly do this? How could I sit in front of a whole lot of people that I didn’t know and pour my guts out on the table? I just couldn’t fathom the fact that God was calling me to be a priest. I would have to walk away from this meeting and just have faith. Extreme faith. Faith I wasn’t sure that I had. I had convinced myself that I couldn’t possibly become a priest. I called your rector, who happens to also be my Dad, and cried and cried and expressed all of my fears. He listened and let me panic for a minute. Then, he very calmly said to me, Mary Balfour, look for the light. He repeated himself, look for the light. Once more, look for the light.

In today’s Gospel reading, John tells us, “The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness does not overcome us.” John is rejoicing that the light had come! The people needed to know then and now, the light had come in to the world! “The true light, which enlightens everyone, was coming into the world.” Hallelujah, he is here! His Father, our Father made this miraculous day happen. He sent us His son. To teach us to love our neighbor, to show us God’s immeasurable love and most importantly to love us no matter how dark the day may feel. Our Lord and Savior is here. He will help us find the light and not be overcome by the darkness.

John states, “the world did not know Him.” It is a hard concept to get our minds around now, the world did not know Jesus? How can that be? How is that possible? You mean there wasn’t a huge party for Him! That seems impossible, doesn’t it?

One thing I have learned this semester in seminary is how much understanding the context in which the Gospels were written can help us to grasp their full meaning. When studying the Bible, I often have to think about what it would mean to live during Jesus’ days. I guess it would seem pretty strange, doesn’t it? right? There is a baby, born in a manager to a virgin no less. He grows up to be young man performing miracles all over of the place. He asks the people to trust and to have faith. Sometimes they didn’t except him. Often He was rejected. As humans, I think we can understand that the concept of rejection. It is not a comfortable feeling to be unwelcome or isolated. Several times this semester, far away from home and lonely, I have had to tell myself to look for the light, look for Jesus.

Jesus didn’t give up though. He was persistent. He taught them and us how to be children of God. John goes on to express to us, “But to all who received Him, who believed in His name, He gave power to become children of God, who were born, not of blood or of the will of man, but of God.”

Even though it is His Birthday, Jesus is the one giving us a present. He is teaching us how to be in relationship with God. In actuality, it is the greatest gift of all time. There isn’t a box big enough for it. There isn’t enough wrapping paper to wrap it. There isn’t a bow big enough. There is a card though and it says: “Here is your present. Here is your gift. Trust me this is the greatest gift I can give you. Be in a relationship with God. Be His child. He loves you so much and I am here to show you. I am here to show you that He is the way out of the darkness. He is your light.”

Finally, John says, “And the Word became flesh and lived among us, and we have seen his glory, the glory as of a father’s only son, full of grace and truth.” We have seen His glory, working in us everyday. He is helping us be the people He is calling us to be. Helping us be His children. Just think, Jesus walked this earth. He helped so many see the light then and now and all the time in between. All we have to do is say YES! Show me the light!

So, Jesus thank you for helping me find the light. I did look for you that day in my fear and anxiety and I found you. You helped me get through that day and many others. Thank you for helping me to realize my call in life. Thank you for the best present you could ever give me, showing me the way in the midst of my own darkness and loving me for exactly who I am, your child.

Today is a holiday for gift giving. God gave us Jesus. Jesus gave us a way back to the Father. Be like our God, and give yourself and each other the gifts of grace and peace, forgiveness and light. May these be with you today and throughout the year. Merry Christmas. Amen.

Blessings to you all as the ride continues…Mary Balfour

Give thanks with a grateful heart.......

Give thanks with a grateful heart…

I will admit this was a tough week. Here are the words that have been playing over and over in my head all week: Papers, Lord give me the strength, papers, get your thoughts organized about what you are writing, papers, Samuel (I am writing a paper on him), theological reflection (I am writing a paper on it), papers, Lord thank you for giving me the strength, oh and a bit of little Hebrew…

I am so thankful to have completed my first semester of Seminary!!! Thank you Lord for guiding me all the way. I did it with your help and I give thanks with a grateful heart.

I do have a few things to finish: papers, finals and Bishop Parsley visiting! Owen and I will be heading to the Deep South on Thursday. I am going to my cousins wedding, spending time with friends in Birmingham and then heading home to TN for Christmas with my precious family.

I want to take this opportunity to thank my classmates and all of those here at the Seminary of the Southwest for a wonderful first semester. You have welcomed me with open hearts. You have supported and loved me, and for that I will be eternally grateful. We come from all walks of life, but we are one in the Body of Christ. Watch out world, you have an amazing group of future priests coming your way!

I really can’t thank you all enough for supporting me on this journey. It is an incredible ride and let me tell you I am one lucky girl to be a part of it. I am so excited about what the future holds for all of us. I look forward to continuing to share my journey with you next semester.

One last thing, if you haven’t read Bishop Sloan’s reflection on his future as the next Bishop of Alabama please do so. Here is the link: www.dioala.org/dfc/newsdetail_2/3150632. Together we can do it!

Blessings to you all as the ride continues…Mary Balfour

Saints and Bishops.....

Saints and Bishops…

Every time there is a feast day on the liturgical calendar, we celebrate it at Christ Chapel! Wednesday was St. Andrew’s day and we rejoiced with a high mass Scottish service using the 1637 Scottish Book of Common Prayer. It was such a magnificent service! I am not sure I have ever been to a mass that “high” and I really appreciated it. The service was filled with old language, incense and bagpipes. St. Andrew’s day was a highlight in my week.

Bishop Parsley is coming to Austin to visit my fellow postulants and me from the Diocese of Alabama. We are thrilled that he is coming to visit. It will be exciting to show off our school to him. This news was another highlight of my week.

Several of my classmates and I have been working on a project to show off the new SSW videos. (If you haven’t checked them out, please do: http://www.ssw.edu/videos.) Every bishop will receive a copy of the video in January. We have been writing our bishops and other bishops we may know, encouraging them to watch the video and share the video with people interested in coming to SSW. This is a really fun project. I love SSW and I want to do all I can to make sure that future seminarians come to visit! If you are a bishop and you are reading this, be on the look out for your videos!

I also want to encourage you all to check out the SSW Advent meditations. I had the honor of writing one myself. You can go online everyday and hear the person that wrote it read their meditation. I really enjoy starting my day off listening to these thoughtful and meaningful meditations. www.ssw.edu/advent2011.

I continue to work on papers and exams and I am making it! I have a full weekend of writing and preparing for a group project that is coming up next week. I ask for your continued prayers as my classmates and I finish out our first semester of seminary.

I continue to whisper your names in Chapel and I celebrate you all in my heart and prayers.

Blessings to you all as the ride continues…Mary Balfour

Tennessee and Texas.....

Tennessee and Texas….

I had a wonderful week in Tennessee and I am back now in my 400 square foot apartment in Texas! I spent some much needed girl time with Mama on Monday. It was great to run errands and just be together. I have missed her so much over the last three months. She is a wonderful friend and mother.

Tuesday and Wednesday were VERY lazy. I don’t have TV in my apartment. I took the opportunity of catching up on all of my favorite shows. I think I really needed time to just be. Not to think, just rest. I did get a paper written, so I didn’t beat myself up too much ☺

Thursday we headed to Chattanooga for Thanksgiving with the Pratt’s. I just love my family. They lift me up, they care and we have so much fun together. I am so thankful to have them - each and every one of them. I am also so glad that my brother Thomas knows how to fry a turkey so well! All of the food was wonderful, but the best part was just enjoying each other’s company.

Friday I spent the day with Daddy. We have so much in common. I guess those commonalities will only continue to grow as I persist in my studies. We have a playful rivalry between Sewanee and Seminary of the Southwest. He is big SSW fan now so I thought he would enjoy a SSW sweatshirt for his birthday. He told me jokingly that he would wear it inside the house ☺. I am so thankful for my Daddy and our time together. Believe me, it helps to have an amazing father, who happens to be a priest, while attending Seminary.

I am back in my apartment and so glad to see my sweet puppy Owen. I told Owen when we woke up this morning that this weekend was all about writing! I have several projects and papers due by December 12th. I have a feeling that my computer will get lots of good use in the coming weeks. I ask your prayers during these difficult two weeks.

I really did miss my seminary community while I was in Tennessee and I am excited to be with them again in Texas. I am also very thankful for all of you and the many blessings God has given us all. I celebrate you all in my heart and prayers.

Blessings to you all as the ride continues…Mary Balfour

Home Sweet Home!

Home Sweet Home!

I am in Tennessee with my family and it feels so good!!! I made it home on Friday in time to spend the evening with my two wonderful brothers, Knox and Thomas, and my amazing parents. I can’t tell you what a treat it is for the five of us to be together. Knox lives in Jackson Hole, Wyoming, so we don’t get to see him often. We have been blessed this year by having the opportunity to see him twice. It was wonderful to share a meal together and just be in the same room with them!

Yesterday we made the short journey to Franklin to celebrate with my cousin Nerren and his bride to be Victoria. All of my cousins and their spouses, on my Mom’s side, were there except one. My cousin James and his wife Courtney were not able to join us. Again, a huge treat to get to hang out with them!!! We had a ball being together and celebrating with Nerren and Victoria.

Today my heart was full when my Daddy gave me communion then gave Mama, Thomas and Knox communion. This hasn’t happened in many years, worshipping together! It was great to worship Christ together. My brothers and I just go back from lunch. I am so thankful to spend time with them.

I really needed to see my family. As much as I love seminary, there is nothing like home sweet home. I look forward to updating you all on my week in Tennessee. May you all enjoy this special week remembering all that God has blessed us with.

Blessings to you all as the ride continues…Mary Balfour

The importance of Hospitality.....

The importance of Hospitality…

We have just completed Fall Visitor’s Weekend here at the Seminary of the Southwest. It was an exciting weekend! There were prospective students on campus from all over the U.S. The weekend reminded me of the importance of hospitality. Hospitality is a ministry. It is an important ministry that God we are called to by God.

The prospective students visited classes, participated in Chapel services and took tours of different students’ homes (my apartment was on the tour). We treated them to our local pub, finishing the weekend with a festival Eucharist, a fabulous dinner and dancing to a bluegrass band.

I was a part of team clean. I now know how the kitchen at SSW runs! It really takes an army to pull off this massive event. Everyone, and I mean everyone, helped make this weekend so special. I think our visitors got a real sense of our amazing community and what life as a seminarian is all about. I am honored to have been a part of this weekend and I can’t wait until we get to do it all over again in the spring!

I finished off the weekend by being a part of St. Mary’s, Birmingham, my home parish, annual meeting. I was “Skyped” in. It was AWESOME to see my Church again and of course all of the people that make it the special place that it is. What a gift to be able to be a part of the annual meeting even though I am so far away. I can’t wait to see them all in person soon.

I am heading to Tennessee on Friday, so next week’s post will be from there. I can’t tell you how excited I am to see my family and to get to attend a party for my cousin Nerren. Nerren is getting married in December and I am thrilled to be a part of the celebration.

Remember, I keep you all close to my heart and continue to love you all even from far away…

Blessings to you all as the ride continues…Mary Balfour

Formation.....

Formation…

Formation is a word that we use often here at the Seminary of the Southwest. All that we are participating in, Chapel, classes and community, are a necessary, hard, fulfilling and loving part of this formation. It is this formation will make us great priests and leaders of the Episcopal Church.

Two of the events that were a part of my formation this week were:

Working on a group project. This is one of those very difficult projects that lead to a great ending. I worked with several of my classmates on a group presentation. Of course we all have different styles and organizations skills. When these differences were put together there was friction. One of my classmates described our differences and the difficulties we encountered as a storm. As a result of this storm we found ourselves having to communicate and pray about the issues at hand. Ultimately we were able to put together a project that made us all proud. Emotions are sometimes difficult to deal with, but often they lead us exactly were we need to be. This group project is great example of how our faith in God and others can lead us to a wonderful end result. Thank you to my classmates, who pushed me, loved me and helped form me this week.

Christ Chapel and its loving attendees. Christ Chapel is a teaching Chapel. You might think of the students much like residents working in a hospital. It is a place that we can make mistakes and learn from them, and yet feel safe at the same time. That was certainly true for me this week. I was the lector at Morning Prayer on Thursday. I have read in Chapel a few times, so I was aware of the flow of the Daily Office. I somehow got the order confused and got up to read before we said the Psalm. Fortunately one of my classmates quietly stopped me. Once I did get up to read, it was a tough passage! You all know those passages in the Bible with lots of difficult names that you stumble over. This particular passage was from Ezra. It was chock full of difficult names! This wasn’t my finest reading moment even though I had practiced reading it several times. But with the help of God and those who were praying for me, I got through it. Despite stumbling through the passage, we worshipped God in Christ Chapel that day, just as we do everyday.

For a sneak peak at next week’s love note I will tell you more about my work-study and some of the amazing work that is being accomplished at SSW. I will also be able to report on Visitor’s Weekend. Please pray for our community as we welcome prospective students to our school. My prayer is that we can convey our love for this place to them.

I have many of you of my mind. I am specifically praying for those who are hurt, lost and broken and are looking for God to open a door for you. Trust, believe, have faith. He is holding both you and me tightly as we continue on this journey together.

Blessings to you all as the ride continues…

Mary Balfour

Happy Halloween!!!!

Happy Halloween!!!

In honor of Halloween, I gave the blog a new look. I have been trying to find some time to “spruce” it up and finally got to do so this week. We had a progressive Halloween party this weekend at SSW and it was lots of fun! I was a sixty’s girl with a FABLOUS pink wig! This is just another example of what a wonderful community I live in and how much fun we have together!

This week I had the honor of being a part of two prospective students visits to campus. I loved having the opportunity to give back to SSW, especially because it has given me so much. It is great to be able to show my school off. I hope to continue to be a part of prospective students’ visits to campus. It wasn’t that long ago that I was in their shoes, so it is a gift to be a part of their discernment process. I truly believe that if you are called to be a priest, then you should go to the seminary that is right for you. That is what I did and I am exactly where God wants me to be.

I want to tell you all about my Liturgy class. My professor is so knowledgeable and has amazing energy. Sometimes when I am in class listening to him I think, wow, this is not the way I understood that! I don’t think he is trying to change my mind, he is just trying to get me to look at things through a different lens. It is refreshing to really feel like you are learning. The knowledge I am gaining often feels like it is seeping into my bones. This knowledge is going straight to my core and connecting my love of God in my heart with my love of God in my head. My professor often says just let this information wash over you. I am doing my best….

I have several group projects and papers due in the coming weeks. I ask your prayers during this challenging but growing time. I am sure that I will make it, but I must admit I am a bit anxious. I don’t just want to mark things off my list; I want to do the work well. I don’t tell him enough, but thank you Daddy for reading everything I write. My Daddy has given me a huge gift of taking on the role of reviewing many of my papers. He is encouraging and teaching me so much. Of course this is in addition to taking care of the hundreds of sheep that need him! Thank you Daddy for taking such good care of all your sheep!! I hope one day I can be half the shepherd you are.

Finally, St. Mary’s family, I will be preaching on February 19th at all four services. Please mark your calendars. It will be my great honor to preach once again in the Church that is supporting me so much on this journey. I miss you all daily and I carry you in my heart.

Blessings to you all as the ride continues…

Mary Balfour

Lovely Day, Lovely Week......

Lovely Day, Lovely Week….

As many of you all might know, I am a huge Bill Withers fan and “Lovely Day” is one of my favorite songs. Well this week I have had many Lovely Days in fact it has been a Lovely Week. So I have played Bill’s song several times on my ipod in honor of this week. As much as I absolutely love my classes (I am not being sarcastic here) it was time for a break. This is how I spent my week:

Monday: Coffee with my friend Vivian and I worked on a paper. I filled up my car with gas for the first time since August and it still had a half of tank left! I also went on my first thrift shop excursion. I loved it! I went in with a plan and a very strict budget (a whopping $30). I came out with some great finds and $2 to spare. As you all know I am on a very tight budget (I don’t have a job), so thrift shops are the way to go. Austin is known for all its wonderful thrift stores. I had so much fun I might never walk in a department store again. A sweet friend sent me a gift certificate to Whole Foods (the flagship store is here in Austin). So I ended the day with some fun treats from Whole Foods and a lovely phone chat with my Aunt Sally.

Tuesday: I did some reading for my Liturgy and Bible classes. Watched a video on the Old Testament with my friend Jodi (yes, this is how seminarians like to spend their free time). I completed my Clinical Pastoral Education applications (no small task I might say) and put them in the mail. Yeah!!! I got to visit with my very dear friend Camille by phone and picked up my buddies Seth and Amber at the airport. As a treat, I got to go to PTerry’s with them for a burger. The burgers were fantastic and the shakes and conversation were even better!

Wednesday: I watched more videos on the Old Testament, took Owen on a long walk and worked on another paper. I also wrote out all of the papers and projects I have due before the end of the semester and made a calendar. There are 10 of them and 4 are due on the last day of classes. Y’all start praying!!! I ended the day with my friends Samantha and James at a fun pizza place called Red House. Samantha and James have become dear friends and we always have a fun time together.

Thursday: Coffee again with Vivian and finished the second paper! More reading and video watching. Owen got a haircut and my apartment got a good clean. I got to go to dinner with a new friend Ainsley. It is exciting to get to know someone outside of the seminary. She was so kind to me and I am looking forward to spending time with her.

Friday: More reading, more videos and a girl’s lunch! We went to a wonderful sandwich shop called Foodheads and it reminded me of Julia’s in Sewanee. It was lots of fun to be with the girls at a fun restaurant and visit. I ended the day with ice cream with my fellow postulants from the Diocese of Alabama and VERY dear friends Seth and Donna.

Saturday: Great catch up phone calls with two dear friends Emily and Ashley. More videos, more reading, long walks for Owen and I; a wonderful day of relaxation!!!

I think I see a pattern, lots of reading, rest and great food in Austin this week! It will be back to regular scheduled programming next week but everyday this week was Lovely.

Blessings to you all as the ride continues…

Mary Balfour

A few cooler days, if 91 degrees is cooler....

A few cooler days, if 91 degrees is cooler…..

It is Fall Break here at the Seminary of the Southwest!!! We are enjoying some cooler weather (only the low 90’s versus the high 90’s) but I will take it! I will say I was very ready for the break. While I really enjoy all of my classes and am learning a lot, everyone needs a break! It will be nice to catch up on schoolwork, sleep late and hopefully get to be a part of some fun Austin adventures.

One of the priorities of the junior class is to visit different Churches in the Austin area. The faculty asks us to do this to get a sense of where we might like to do our parish fieldwork. I have been to three different Churches - and they were all COMPLETELY different. I really enjoyed them all but nothing feels like St. Mary’s to me. I guess it is part of my formation to let go of my past and to be open to my future. It is very likely that the Church I will serve will be very different from St. Mary’s, so this exposure to different types of parishes is a good thing. We have to write a report after each visit. I think this is a very good assignment and I feel sure that God will lead me to the perfect field education experience.

We did have a Blessing of the Animals liturgy here at SSW. Of course Owen received his annual blessing. Lots of people have animals, so it was fun to meet them all. We also celebrated the founder of SSW, The Rt. Rev. John Hines. John Hines was Bishop of Texas and then the Presiding Bishop of the Episcopal Church during the Civil Rights movement. It was fun to have his family and our Board of Trustees on campus. I really enjoyed meeting them all and learning more about this very special man.

I also am working very hard on my Clinical Pastoral Education applications. Next summer I will be an intern chaplain at a hospital. I am applying in Birmingham, Chattanooga and Murfreesboro. So stay tuned on where I will be spending the summer of 2012!

The Seminary of the Southwest admission’s department just produced new, FANTASTIC videos about SSW. I encourage you to check out these videos so that you can experience first hand my wonderful school. www.ssw.edu/videos

I hope this love note finds you all well. I continue to think of you all often and you remain in my daily prayers.

Blessings to you all as the ride continues…

Mary Balfour

Sometimes Life Hurts.....

Sometimes life hurts….

As many of you know my first cousin Zachary died this week. Zachary was a young man who came in to my life about 20 years ago. My aunt Mary Gibson adopted Zachary Polk and his sister Ashley Morgan when they were 3 and 5 years old. I remember being excited for my Aunt, who had finally become a mother to these two children. Zachary and Ashley desperately needed a mother and a family and that is exactly what they got. In turn, our family was blessed with two precious children who gave us all so much joy. I remember seeing Zachary for the first time and those beautiful eyes. He was FULL of energy and loved Monteagle, our summer home. It is most fitting that he will be buried there. I thank God for giving us Zachary and Ashley and the short time we had with Zachary.

My family has lost two important members of our family in the last two months. We love you Margaret and Zachary and we know that you are in the arms of God and visiting with Dear. I am sure she is welcoming you and taking great care of you both.

I must say it is VERY difficult not to be with my family this weekend. I would like to hold Daddy’s hand as he prepares to preach the homily at his nephew’s memorial service. I would like to hug Aunt Mary Gibson and Ashley and let them know how much I love them. I can’t do any of this and it is hard to understand this situation. I do know that God is with us. He wants me to cry with Him and to know that all will be well. I try to remember that on a daily basis, but especially this weekend.

Next week, I will catch you up on my life here in Austin. This week, I just want to remember Margaret and Zachary and thank God for putting them in my life.

Father of all, we pray to you for Zachary and Margaret, and for all those whom who we love but see no longer. Grant to them eternal rest. Let light perpetual shine upon them. May their souls and the souls of all the departed, through the mercy of God, rest in peace. Amen.

Blessings to you all as the ride continues…

Mary Balfour

A week of firsts......

A week of firsts…

This week has been a week of firsts. Some good, some bad, but my formation is happening. I am surrounded by people that challenge me everyday and that is a good thing! I am learning to live in community and stretch myself. This process will only help me to be the best priest I can be.

So this week’s firsts include:

- Walking the Labyrinth. If you have never walked a labyrinth, I encourage you to do so. It is a peaceful and calming experience. I felt God’s presence all around me while I was walking. There were wind chimes blowing in the wind, beautiful yellow flowers in my view and most importantly the Holy Spirit was present. You can learn more about the Labyrinth experience at: www.labyrinthsociety.org

- I attended my first Spanish Eucharist. A Spanish service occurs weekly in Christ Chapel, but for one reason or another I have not been able to attend. It was wonderful to sing all the hymns in Spanish and actually receive Jesus’ body and blood in words that were unfamiliar to me. It was a glorious celebration of the Hispanic Heritage and St. Michael’s and All Angels.

- I officiated for the first time on Thursday at Morning Prayer! I was so nervous. I have been a lecture and a chalice bearer before, but I have never been responsible for the entire service. I practiced and practiced and did my best to prepare, but I was still very nervous. When the service started God gave me peace and, of course, we worshipped Him in the exact way we were suppose to that morning. It was a wonderful experience and I am very excited to learn more about the liturgy of the Episcopal Church and how to officiate at different worship services.

I did practice my non-anxious presence this week. There were some moments that I was more successful than others ☺, but I will continue to work on it. I look forward to seeing what this week has in store for me. I also continue to miss you all so much and feel your powerful prayers. Thank you for your love!

Blessings to you all as the ride continues…

Mary Balfour

Anxiousness is the word of the week.....

Anxiousness is the word of the week…

All week I have been anxious. As most of you know, I am a pretty anxious person, but this week has been especially anxious. I seem to be fixated on papers and reading and sad about the fact that I can’t be with family and friends at this present time in my life. I was reminded several times throughout the week to be calm and to feel God’s presence in my being. Even the collect for last Sunday spoke to this:

Grant us O Lord, not to be anxious about earthly things, but to love things heavenly; and even now, while we are placed among things that are passing away, to cleave to those that shall abide; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who liveth and reigneth with thee and the Holy Spirit, one God, forever and ever. Amen.

So my plan for this week is to be a non-anxious presence. To just enjoy my time here at the Seminary of the Southwest, and to quote one of my professors, “let what I am learning in class and chapel wash over me.”

I FINALLY went to Church in Austin today. I have spent so much time in Chapel that I didn’t really want to go to Church on Sunday mornings. It is hard for me to believe that because I love attending Church!!! I think some of my anxiousness was attributed to the fact that I hadn’t worshipped in a Church for a while. I spent the morning at St. Matthew’s Church. It is a lovely parish filled with the Holy Spirit and an excellent choir ☺. I was thankful to be able to worship with them today.

I also got to spend some time this weekend with my new seminary friends. It was great to just laugh and enjoy each other. I am particularly grateful for the guidance of my fellow Postulants from the Diocese of Alabama, Donna and Seth. They have taken such good care of me and continue to be lights in my life.

I continue to whisper your names in Chapel and think of you all daily.

Blessings to you all as the ride continues…

Mary Balfour

Life is like walking on jello....

Life is like walking on jello…

A classmate described our seminary life as like walking on jello. She is correct. It is a hard adjustment and it feels exactly like walking on jello. To be honest with you all, I am just working on getting steady feet. The amount of reading and writing of papers is overwhelming. It is difficult to keep up at times and I continue to pray for balance. I know God wants me to be here and I am honored to have the opportunity. I just need to figure out how to make it all flow and not feel like there is jello under my feet!

I want you all to know that I am happy. Truly happy. Chapel life, living in a fantastic community and talking about the Christian faith everyday makes me giddy! Thank you Lord for sending me to Austin and to the Seminary of the Southwest.

I did take a break this weekend and attend Austin City Limits. This is a music festival with tons of terrific bands. I got to spend time with friends from the Seminary and one of my oldest friends, Will and his lovely bride, Jen. It was a much-needed break. Getting to see Stevie Wonder live is something I will never forget!!!

It is difficult for me to communicate with everyone so I hope you think of this blog as my love note to you all. Your names are whispered in Chapel often and I continue to be thankful for so many supportive friends and family.

Blessings to you all as the ride continues…

Mary Balfour

It's Official......

It’s Official….

I am official student at Seminary of the Southwest after the matriculation service that was held on Thursday, September 8th. Daddy was here for the celebration service followed by a festive meal. It was a joy to be able to share the experience with him. I think we have a new fan of the Seminary of the Southwest in Daddy. He seemed very pleased with the school, my classmates and my professors. He even went to class with me, which was a lot of fun. On Friday night we went to see the bats in downtown Austin with my dear friends from Alabama, Donna and Seth. Every night, right at dusk, one and a half million bats come out from under the bridge. There were several hundred people on the bridge and dozens more in all different sorts of watercraft on the river watching the spectacle. It is so cool and a great “free” event for the people of Austin. Afterwards we went to a food trailer park and enjoyed Torchy’s Tacos famous fried avocado, followed by Amy’s ice cream. Two wonderful local Austin favorites!!! It was a great weekend with Daddy and I am honored he came to visit me.

This weekend was also Mama’s 60th Birthday! She spent the weekend at the beach with some of her best buddies. I made a DVD of her life and sent it down with one of her friends. I had a ball putting it together and I could tell she really enjoyed it. She told me she wouldn’t have rewritten the actually birthday celebration in any way. Happy Birthday Mama!!! You are the best in every way and we are blessed to have you in our lives!!!

Life as a seminarian is becoming very real to me. I spend a lot of time reading, a requirement since I have 4 papers due before the end of September! It is going to be a real challenge, but one that I am up for. I ask for your prayers in the coming weeks as I settle into a routine and learn to write strong and intelligent papers.

Blessings to you all as the ride continues……

Mary Balfour

And So It Begins....

And So It Begins….

Today, September 6, 2011, I completed my very first day of seminary classes. I was excited, nervous, anxious, and overwhelmed, but most importantly I am just honored to be here! The first class of the day started with prayer. In that moment, I felt God’s presence so clearly. I couldn’t help but thank Him for giving me this opportunity. I worshipped several more times throughout the day in addition to attending classes and enjoying a community lunch.

My class is gathering tonight to debrief the day and just enjoy each other’s company -- and Daddy comes to visit me tomorrow! I am so excited to show him my new home and of course enjoy all that Austin has to offer. On Thursday night we will have a Matriculation Service, a service to welcome all of the new students to campus, followed by a festive dinner. I am thrilled to be able to share that experience with Daddy.

My class elected me as one of our student representatives to Student Council. I am honored to serve and I am very excited to add this to my list of activities. I start my work-studies tomorrow as well. Guess where I will be 7 hours of each week - the Development Office! ☺ I am really excited to be a part of the development team at the Seminary of the Southwest. I am also one the library maids (the official library duster for 6 hours a week). Margaret would be so proud! I am just glad to earn my keep….

I can’t tell you how thankful I am for the many calls, emails, Facebook messages, and most importantly prayers that I have received over the past few weeks. The support that so many have given me is truly humbling.

Thanks for continuing to be a part of the ride….

Mary Balfour

Margaret.....

For the past two days I have been on a retreat with my classmates. We had a great time sharing our stories and just getting to know each other. It is interesting to spend time with people that have the same desire in their hearts as you do, to serve God's people as a priest. I believe that this is a group of people that will support me and love me through the next three years and hopefully for many years after seminary. In fact, they have already proved how much they care.

Daddy called me on Wednesday morning. I thought something might be wrong because he knew I was at the retreat. He told me that Margaret had died. Margaret was a very special person who has ALWAYS been a part of my life. She helped raise me and my brothers and in fact she did the same for Daddy. Margaret came to work for my great grandmother when she was 13 years old. She lived outside of our house in the Mississippi Delta for the first 15 years of my life. I don't remember a time when she wasn't there. Margaret took care of many generations of Van Zandt's and loved us as if we where her own. She was a Van Zandt even if that wasn't her last name. She had a very special bond with my youngest brother Thomas. She would never admit it but he was always her favorite. The image of a black woman in her 60's and a little white boy who were the best of friends is a powerful image for me. This image seemed so natural to me and probably made no sense to my classmates. They supported me anyway. They let me cry and tell a few stories about Margaret. I have discovered over the last few days that the world will be a better when it has my classmates as priests. They know how to love, they know how to do what Jesus asked us to do.

Mama said to me today that she believes that Margaret is sitting at a table with my great grandmother and my grandmother and all those that she so graciously served for many years and finally breaking bread with them. Thank you Margaret for taking such good care of us for so many years and allowing us to be a part of your life.

Thank you Lord for the life of your good and faithful servant, Margaret Davis.

Thanks for coming along on the ride.

Mary Balfour

Feeling Oriented....

Here I am, sitting in my four hundred square foot apartment in Austin, TX, facing a fear, writing and actually having others read what I write. More importantly, I am in Austin, TX in a four hundred square foot apartment. What! It actually happened, I am a student at the Seminary of the Southwest. After a four year discernment process I am here! My dream to serve God's people as a priest might actually happen.

I realize that it is important for me to express my feelings during this journey and I am humbled that people have taken the time to read what I have to say. As I stated above, my writing skills are not the best so please bare with me.

I am feeling oriented because I have completed day two of my orientation at Seminary of the Southwest. I have wonderful classmates that I am honored to be in the company of, professors that will challenge me and even love me along the way and on top of all of that, I get to go to Church three times a day! I am not be sarcastic, I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, this part of seminary.

The first few days of orientation have been filled with financial aid information, insurance, buying books and lots of fellowship. I even chanted today all by myself. It was pretty horrible, but something that I need to learn to do. You never know, I could one day serve a Church that loves to chant and I better know what the heck I am doing!!! I did convince the Music Professor to let me sing Come Though Fount of Every Blessing. I did a little better with the hymn! I am not sure I will be asked to be a part of the choir, but I will always due my best to make a joyful noise.

We have tomorrow afternoon off and then we are back to being oriented on Sunday afternoon. I am looking forward to spending time with Owen and resting. I heard there is a possible outing to see the bats of Austin tomorrow at the Bat Fest. You know Austin, we like to keep it weird!!!

Thanks for coming along on the ride. Until we meet again....

Blessings,

Mary Balfour